The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost. ~G.K. Chesterton
I scooped them up and stacked them in a little pile, my Birthday cards from August. I had them all sitting on the top of my dresser, face out. It was like being smiled at each day. Finally I decided it was time to dust, so afterwards I went to store them away. Instead I read them again......
I couldn't do it. I couldn't put them away just yet. Not when I read the words and felt the love behind them all. I wasn't quite ready to let them go.....
I get cards every year and every year I treasure them. But his year, they meant more. Maybe because I needed them more. Maybe because when I stack myself up against the fruits of the Spirit, like I did this morning, I see where I am lacking.
I see how far I have to go......But when I read the words in these cards, the lives and the love behind them lurch at my heart. I read:
"You are the best sister a brother could ask for and I think of you everyday." My brother was sweet to me when I was small. He held my hand, walked me to school and didn't let me out of his sight....but then adolesence came and well, let's just say, he was in the cool crowd and I was not. Now as we get older we are recapturing time lost. He has remembered what we had. That he has a sister that loves him, has always loved him.
And from my Mom....."You are my special present in life, thank you for always being there for me." Yet, so many moments I worry that I am 12 hours away and not there nearly enough. I worry about all those times I am not there. But she makes me feel like I am.
And from my Aunt, I would recognize her perfectly slanted penmanship anywhere. Even though she is suffering right now the sadness of a husband in the latter stages of dementia and is now rattling around in a lonely house....she writes a hearlfelt paragraph.......she has kept her postive attitude and healthy sense of humor intact.
And from Diane.....she writes with love that God has placed me in her life, thanking me for being the friend and sister she never had.
And I know my Dad went to the store and hand picked this card out, it's a pink bicycle with a verse from Deuteronomy 14:2....."The Lord has chosen you to be His treasured possession." He chose the bike because one of the memories he treasures in his heart is when he taught me to ride a bike. All those hours running along behind me in case I fell....and me looking back to make sure he was still there. He says: "Now you have become the strong anchor or faith and stability for Mom and I."
........and I guess it means so much because too many times, all I see is how I am lacking and how I miss the mark.
But these people I love and who love me, see the fruit of the Spirit in me somehow. This amazes me. How could I feel anything other than impossibly wealthy?
I will tuck the cards away another day, probably soon, just not today.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22, 23